Losing Trace

We lost Trace on October 10th.

I went to grab him to feed him early in the morning and I knew something was wrong as soon as I opened the door to the room and saw him in his bed.

He was gone. He died in his sleep.

He was four months old.

We miss him so much every day. Things are not the same without him in our lives.

I miss his quick smile, his chubby cheeks, the joy in his heart, and the light in his eyes.

I don't know if this will get any easier but I feel like I needed to say something...just to put my story out there. I used to feel like bad things like this never really happened to people, at least not to people in my world. Now I know.
Now I know what it means to be sad, to be lost. I know that there are guarantees in this life. I am forever changed and my world will never be the same.

But I also know that God is bigger than death and I know Trace is in heaven.
I believe it with all my heart. If there is one thing I know for sure, it is that Trace is safe in God's arms and free from the trials and pain of this world. I feel Trace's spirit and even though my heart hurts I still have a piece of Trace in it.

Instead of having him in my arms, I now carry him in my heart.

Revelation 21:4
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

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