A Record of Rose

February!

2012-02-01T12:11:00.005-06:00

Can I get a woo-hoo for a new month?

Woo hoo!

I am so happy January is over. A new month and fresh calendar pages means we are 31 days closer to SPRING and SUMMER and SUNSHINE and (every mom's dream) PLAYING OUTSIDE!!

I get excited and sad when a new months turns over because it is one more month that we've been without Trace. I get excited because I made it through a whole month (where at the beginning I feel like I couldn't even make it through an hour) but my heart hurts because it means we've been without him for just that much longer. We are closing in on the date where we will have not had him for longer than we actually had him. My mind barely wraps around it.

---------

Switching gears now....

Micheal loves all things Cars and so when this little set popped up at the consignment store I knew the price was right. At $4.50 it has exceeded its expectations for an afternoon of entertainment and become one of Michael's favorites.

McQueen is a favorite around here for sure and he seems to always be in Michael's hand. He even sleeps with him and kisses him goodnight...it's bad. You know what is really bad? When we lose McQueen. We had an episode yesterday where he was left in Scott's car and we couldn't find him. I think I need backups!!

I love, love, love watching Michael play. The gears are turning away in his head and I would love to jump in there and see whats going on. He is such a sweet boy and I am so thankful every day that I have him in my life. It is such a hard thing to be faced with two of the most powerful emotions every day of my life- joy and anguish. Joy that I have Michael and got to have Trace but anguish that my family is not complete here on Earth.

A person would easily think there could only be one of those emotions at a time but in my life they are both ever present. How can I not be joyful when I am surrounded by my family? But how can I not be anguished knowing that my family isn't complete? It is exhausting.

I'm trying to find a little good in every day to pull me through this crazy things called life and most days it is my sweet Michael....playing with his cars and being his curious self.

Instagram friday

2012-01-27T10:05:00.002-06:00

Picnik

2012-01-24T13:49:00.003-06:00

Did you guys hear that picnik is closing? I am sad. I used it sometimes but unfortunately not enough to warrant a membership. However, they are offering all the premium features for free from now until they shut down in April so I've been having lots of fun making up these fun collages. You should give it a try!

This is a random selection of photos I've uploaded to blogger since I've started my blog (you can pull photos from facebook, picasa, flickr to work with on picnik).

Its so funny to look back on some of them...you can tell I really have a limited selection of topics that I blog about! :o)

Things that are making me happy today

2012-01-23T12:38:00.003-06:00

1. My photos:

2. Balloons and cookies:

You know you are having a trying day when you have to text your husband "bring home cookies". And then it's awesome when he delivers. With sprinkles. And a balloon.

3. The concentration of a little boy hard at work:

4. Watching my boys play outside.

And that is all. We are home sick today and staying inside because of the weather!

Survival mode...it's finally Friday!

2012-01-20T08:30:00.003-06:00

Happy Friday...we made it!! Hurray!

I feel like I am 100% in survival mode this week. Am I the only one? The crummy weather for sure has to have something to do with it. Michael and I have been trying to get out of the house but it's been cold and driving even in a little snow makes me super nervous. Also, I am sooo tired already of getting all of Michael's winter gear on him before leaving the house. Who's with me on that one? I feel so bad even complaining about it all because really...it's been a great winter and I need to remember that.

Now that I'm done complaining (sorry!)....stay warm out there this weekend!

Missing my baby today

2012-01-17T08:31:00.004-06:00

I'm missing my baby today.
Today would have been Trace's 8th month birthday.
Can you even believe it? I know I can't.
I wish he was here.

(Trace's last day with us)

(3 months old)

We love you, Trace.

Playtime is serious business

2012-01-14T08:37:00.005-06:00

Michael has been taking playtime very seriously around here. I found him two little Lightning McQueen cars (keen-cars, he calls them) and his favorite thing to do is trying to fit them into other vehicles. His favorite mode of transportation for his cars is the little people airplane (because McQueen rides in an airplane in Cars 2) and our Mack truck car transporter (because McQueen also does that in the movie) but he obviously isn't opposed to them riding on the pirate ship also. He hasn't watched the movie a lot of times but we have some Cars books that we read from time to time and he likes to examine the pictures and then replicate the scene in his own playing. I think it is really silly and I am always wondering what is going on in that little mind of his.

He holds the little car in his hand 24 hours a day. Yes, even when he is sleeping.

We've also been having some confusion because he loves his McQueen car (keen-car) and also he loves The Lion King (which he calls keen-a-movie (but movie is like moo-ee)). ?? His language takes a little creative interpretation but he's gotten to the point where if I say something that is not what he means he can say no and then try and say it again more clearly. Really, it's a wonder we even get along as well as we do (kidding).

Also, our new Lion King movie has sing-a-long mode....score. When I was in 6th grade I had the whole soundtrack to the movie memorized and I still do. LOVE IT!!

Friday

2012-01-13T11:33:00.006-06:00

Happy Friday!

Ordinary Days and Working Again

2012-01-12T09:03:00.003-06:00

It seems to me now that January is here we've really fallen into a pattern of our ordinary days. Ordinary days where we just stay inside, make blanket nests, and eat bananas.

....and eat more bananas. We go through lots of them.

This week was my second being back at work and its been going fine. It is familiar to me and I missed seeing all my students and colleagues. The biggest change is finding all the energy to be motivating and exciting for my students. I've also been missing my downtime during my leave when Michael had childcare two days a week. I'm so thankful I had the time to just be reflective and do nothing however...I think it is time to start getting in a better routine around here.

This week also marked three months since we've lost Trace. I hate even typing that...it seems like so much longer in my mind. The concept of time is really doing a doozy on my spirit these days. The thought of a new year ahead of me to get through seems like too much. 12 whole months, 52 long weeks, 365 new mornings...its a lot. I'm not really sure how to deal with it other than just trying to find positive things in today, in this hour, and in this moment.

(image via pinterest)

A little sunshine

2012-01-10T07:59:00.003-06:00

I have been loving these sunny days lately. It is causing my spirit to think it's March or April when really....there is is still a lot of winter left to be had. I'm not alone in this, right? January is depressing but the sunshine is helping to make it a little better.

Sunlight blazes through our front door every late afternoon and you have to shield your eyes when you walk past. I love it...if only I could curl up on the rug and soak it in for hours just like my silly cat. That would be the life.

I'm linking up today at sweet shot tuesday over at m3b....come join the fun!

Friday phone dump (vacation edition)

2012-01-06T12:22:00.006-06:00

I'm trying to do a better job of sharing my iphone photos (iphone-tography, if you will) so hopefully I can make this a weekly thing.

Florida

2012-01-05T08:57:00.004-06:00

I'm trying to put all my Florida pictures in one post so brace yourselves. I've been continually trying to weed through my vacation photos and I think these are all my favorites. Hopefully it brings a little sunshine to your day, even though it is supposed to be a record-breaker today in Iowa with temps of 60 degrees (crazy!).

Our only family picture from the trip...the timer went off as Scott was trying to zip up Michael's fly. At least we're together?

My favorite day was when we did a little family of three trip to nearby Seaside, Florida. It is the town where the movie "The Truman Show" was filmed and it is such a cute town. We walked, got coffee, walked on the beach...it was awesome.

Truman Show house.

It was nice every day we were there and we made sure we got lots of beach time. The water was cold but wasn't too bad once you got in. Michael loved the sand and being able to run outside.

We went on the trip with my husband's side of the family (his parents, brother and sister's families) and his aunt's condo was our main base of operation although we each also had our own condos. Scott's aunt's condo was right on the beach and it was so awesome.

It was a great trip and I can't wait to go back again soon. I was so worried about going and being gone from home at Christmas but once we were there, there were no worries. It was very relaxing and nice to reconnect with Scott and spend lots of time with our son and other family together. I think the hardest part has been coming home and realizing that I need to keep trudging on with my real life. It is hard to stay positive especially now that is seems like there is little on the horizon to look forward to. I am trying to do some things that I can work towards and keep me motivated daily, so hopefully I will keep you updated.

Happy Thursday.

A late Christmas update

2012-01-03T09:15:00.002-06:00

Merry Christmas...about a week and a half late. :o)

It might be past the prime time for sharing Christmas morning photos, but I figured late was better than never. Hopefully it is a little Christmas cheer for you as you get ready to go back to work today (who's working? I go back tomorrow- yikes).

Michael was really into Santa this year and it was so much fun for me. We talked about it before he went to bed on Christmas Eve and when he woke up bright and early on Christmas Day he saw his presents and said, "Santa here?". He knew.

We opened up a few small presents from Santa while at our condo (two new trains- James and Toby) and then headed over to the main condo where Scott's parents were staying for more present opening, breakfast and coffee.

How grown up is my niece? It kills me.

I also subjected everyone to a group photo via my camera self time and remote. It was slightly painful, but I figured we had better get it done while we all looked nice and early on in our trip.

We went out for a big Christmas dinner buffet at a local restaurant that was awesome and then came back home to relax and play with new presents.

As you can see from the above photo, angry birds and wine were the hit of the evening. The rest of the trip we spent lots of time on the beach...and it was awesome.

Back to Reality

2012-01-02T10:16:00.001-06:00

Welcome, 2012.

I suppose it is time for me to get back to reality. We spent seven days in sunny Panama City Beach, Florida over Christmas and it was wonderful.

I'm not going to lie, it is hard being back home and back to our life again. The thought of a year passing makes me so sad. I'm going back to work again in a few days, a reminder that life needs to keep trudging on even if I want it to stay the same.

I'll be back to share more soon, I promise.

Merry Christmas!

2011-12-25T06:22:00.000-06:00

Merry Christmas!

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above.

James 1:17

2011- Trace's Year

2011-12-24T09:05:00.000-06:00

Dear friends and family,

This year I just couldn't find the words soon enough to send an actual Christmas letter. There are so many things I want to tell you and it is hard to put them into one neat little package of words, sentences, and paragraphs.

Christmas cards and letters are one of my favorite things about the season and I save my favorites from year to year and I love looking back on them. I save my mother's, grandmother's and mother in law's letter each year (as well as the photos from friends and family) and I love looking back at that little piece of paper that so nicely wraps up the year. My mom's newsletter is usually a similar version of itself each year. She states she has the same job, same family, same house, same life.

I wish that I could also do the same.

I often daydream about how things would be if they just stayed the same. A little "same-ness" around here would be nice, don't you think?

But that is not life. Life is always changing although it might appear on the outside everything is staying the same.

2011 started out very hopeful for us with a new baby on the way. I had visions of how our life would be with two sweet babies in our lives. I was, of course, nervous about having two children so small but so excited to have a little new baby in the house again. The pregnancy was uneventful and the delivery was smooth, thanks to scheduled c-section. I will never forget how excited I was when Scott told me "It's a boy!" with the biggest smile on his face. Trace was perfect. Two boys. I was the luckiest mother in the world.

Trace so much a part of our family right away, a true blessing. Isn't it funny how things happen in your life and once they happen you couldn't imagine it any other way? I think of my life moments like this often, they are like ticks in the timeline of my life: the moment when I knew I wanted to be a music teacher, the moment when I first met Scott, the moment he asked me to marry him, the first time we brought sweet baby Michael home in his little baby carrier, Trace. They are the moments where they happen and then afterwards you are like, "what now?" because you can't imagine your life ever being the same.

I am trying to wrap my head around everything that happened to us in the past year and one thing that is true is now nothing will ever be the same. It is hard to live your life and know so strongly that a part of you is missing. It seems like such a short period of time when you say we only had Trace for four and half months. Four and a half months. It isn't even half a year. But in my mind it seems like so much more than that. It is hard to even give that period of time a label because it is so special to me. From the moment Trace was born he was a part of our family and had our whole hearts.

There is no doubt will we always think of 2011 as the year we lost Trace, but I am trying so hard to think of it as the year we got Trace.

2011 is the year of Trace.

Trace's year.

I wish I could say that I hope next year will be easier, but I know in my heart it won't. He will always be missing from our family.

So while it appears from the outside that everything on the outside is the same with our family (same house, same jobs, same activities), really everything is different. We are forever changed. We are thankful for many things, and we are most thankful that we got to have and be blessed by Trace.

And this shall be a sign unto you; You shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
-Luke 2:12

We are sending lots of love your way,

Scott, Rose & Michael

Someone's missing...

2011-12-23T08:00:00.002-06:00

It just seems so weird to me that Trace isn't in any of our family pictures with us this year. It is almost too sad to know that he won't ever been in any of our family pictures. I do feel him in my heart and I know he is with us in spirit. I know Christmas is probably way better in Heaven.

We are having a hard time without him with us here and now.

Lord, please take good care of our baby boy.

A little Christmas Color

2011-12-22T08:52:00.002-06:00

Are you ready for a little Christmas color? It seems so dreary and brown around here that I know I sure am!

My sisters in law sent me this bright flower arrangement thinking of us and Trace. I thought it was really fitting for Christmas....but not in a totally-evergreen-and-red-carnation-poinsettia-Christmas sort of way. It really made me happy.

(...and it made someone else really happy too because the first time they delivered it to the wrong house and the person just accepted it...what?? I hope they enjoyed their random flower arrangement and thanks to the flower shop for getting me a new one).

I love it. I am excited to plant flowers this spring for Trace...maybe I will do a flower garden by his tree? We shall see. The thoughts of those warm sunny days are getting me through these dark December days.

In other plant news....my begonia is re blooming again! After Trace's funeral it looked bad... real bad and so I just hacked it down to almost nothing. I was ready to toss it when I saw a huge begonia blooming on my favorite show, Boardwalk Empire. This was right after I said to Scott I needed a room like Nucky's solarium for all my house plants and then boom! they cut right to Margaret and the peach begonia that looked just like mine was in the background. It was a sign, I'm sure of it. Or maybe I am the only weird one who pays attention to house plants in tv shows? :o)

At any rate, I'm looking for all the signs I can these days and those little peach buds on my begionia are making me pretty happy. They are like Trace's sweet face telling me everything is going to be all right.

A week with Aunt Denise

2011-12-21T12:06:00.004-06:00

My sister is a freshman at the best University in the world (aka, Iowa State) and she was done early with her finals this year. She spent the rest of the week with us and it was a lot of fun. I hope she realizes how much I appreciated having her here; she was big help and it was nice just to have some extra noise in the house.

Michael has graduated from calling her : Aun-niece (Aunt + Denise) to a very pronounced Dah-NieCE. It was so cute and he called her name the whole time she was here. I think she is right at the top of his list of favorite people which is very prestigious to be on. :o)

I had a busy week and it was so nice to have an extra helper around. We visited Santa at the mall and it was a great experience. I had gotten my hair cut the day earlier while Michael was at daycare so we scoped out the situation and knew exactly what time Santa was getting there so we could avoid the lines and crowds.

I was so happy to have Denise with me so she could man my child while I could take photos of the whole thing. I couldn't really imagine how it would work taking him by myself and I'm glad it worked out this way. We prepped Michael in the car on the way there and he did fantastic.

Do you want to guess what he asked Santa for?

More choo-choos.

We ask him about a hundred times a day what Santa is going to bring him and he never falters in his answer, it is always more choo-choos. The kid is sticking to his guns. Hopefully Santa doesn't let him down....I have a feeling he won't.

:o)

Denise also really hit it off with the main Elf working and she said next year she is going to be the Elf at the mall. I am totally holding her to this!

Denise was also a big help watching Michael while I hosted my small group bible study at my house, went to a doctor's appointment, while I did chores around the house, and even watched Michael while Scott and I went on a very special (overnight!) date downtown.

We also did a small cookie making adventure in which Michael was only mildly interested in (thankfully).

His main goal was to get as many sprinkles on the cookies as possible. I only let him decorate one pan of cookies so the rest were edible and no one suffered from sprinkle overload.

It was a great week and I'm so glad I got to spend some time with sister. She is a pretty awesome aunt and I'm glad she is in my life. Thanks, Denise!

Cantata Weekend

2011-12-19T15:27:00.006-06:00

This past weekend was the big Christmas Cantata at my church. The orchestra played at 5 services over the weekend and today I am physically and emotionally drained. It was an awesome weekend, but it was hard to play the music, concentrate, and keep it all together at the same time.

One of my favorite parts of the service was this little boy who sang during offering. The lyrics of his song were:

I'm a little baby boy
Sent to bring you joy
I'm a little baby boy
who will bring peace on earth.

I had a unique vantage point from being seated on the stage and at every service there was not a dry eye in the crowd. It was really special to watch, especially all the men who were trying to pretend like they weren't crying. It was pretty powerful.

(photos credit)

The Cantata this year had a message about the journey to Bethlehem and how Mary and Joseph (and us) need to keep on the journey even at times when we can't see God or our faith is tested. It really rung true for me and the words that the choir sang have been placed in my heart this Christmas. I have mentioned this before, but just the image of a sweet little innocent baby being born really hits me harder than it has in previous years. What could a tiny baby do? Well... a lot. Babies change the world. I kept thinking how I would totally travel to Bethlehem and bring the mother Mary a lasagna and visit the baby Jesus if I lived 2,000 years ago. :o)

In all seriousness, this is one of my favorite weekends to participate in as a musician. There is something special about listening to a great concert but there is something even more special about making the music and pouring your heart into it. I felt like even though it is hard for me to keep playing, it is something I can do for Trace. Even though performing a concert may seem the like opposite idea of healing for some people, for me it was the right thing to do. During the final performance I really felt a connection to something that was larger than I am...whether it was Trace's spirit or God's or both but I felt it.

Lead us to a place
Guide us with Your grace
To a place where we'll be safe

--"The Prayer"

The whole weekend was a reminder about what Christmas is all about and I hope this peace continues for not only me but for all of you as we really start to get into the heart of things now that the big day is right around the corner. Hopefully you can get all the things on your lists checked off and spend time with your loved ones. :o)

A really wimpy holiday decorating post...

2011-12-16T15:30:00.002-06:00

My holiday decorating this year could easily be described as....wimpy. Uninspired, really. And guess what? I am okay with it. Our tree is up and lit and even Michael has a little tree in his room to keep him company at night. We didn't get our lights up on our trees outside, but we did put a few strands on our deck. A star wreath on my front door and we are good to go.

A confession: I had a breakdown when decorating my tree this year. I think we are going to get a real one for sure next year. It takes so much junk on the stupid fake tree to even make it look kind of good. So frustrating. I've already started my inspiration board on Pinterest for Christmas 2012 when hopefully things will feel better around here.

I made a few of these ornaments using Mod Podge, some photos I had, and a Sharpie paint pen. They are really sweet and I love seeing them on my tree. I hope this is a holiday tradition we can carry on for years- how fun would it be to see all those photo ornaments in 10 years? I made a couple with Trace's photo, one with Michael's and one with the two of them together. Wouldn't it also be fun to have one with the whole family?

That is the extent of my holiday decorating...a little Christmas spirit, but not too much. I hope your homes are feeling festive also!

This Boy

2011-12-15T08:21:00.001-06:00

This boy...he cracks me up all the time. He is learning so much every day and making lots of connections. I've been trying to record some of the funny things he's been doing lately.

"Damos" for McDonalds. We were running out to my Christmas concert the other night and I told him Scott would take him to McDonalds after they dropped me off. He said, "Daddy, damos, daddy, damos" the whole way there! He can now also say what he wants to eat at McDonalds which is "Chicken nugget and apple".

Michael loves to draw his dad's boat when he is coloring. The last time he was coloring I asked him if that was what he was drawing. He said, "no, Michael's boat".

Michael's favorite sport is hockey. We went to a hockey game and it was at night, and now everytime we leave our house at night he thinks we are going to a hockey game. He loves to run around in circles and say he is playing hockey. If he sees a game on TV he'll get excited and scream, "HOCKEY!!".

...that's all I got for now. I'll have to remember to keep jotting them down!

iphone photo dump

2011-12-14T08:37:00.001-06:00

So Thankful

2011-12-13T09:50:00.002-06:00

We got the biggest surprise last weekend when a few of our friends came over and gave us this beautiful mirror:

I cried when I opened it and saw the top of it. It's our house. The whole mirror is kind of like our life.

I love that one little square is Scott and I tailgating. :o)

My most favorite square is this little bird with Trace's initials on the heart.
So, so sweet.

We have the perfect place to hang it and I know it will hang in our house forever. Forever, forever...I mean it. Friends, you are too generous and kind and you will also be getting a nice note in the mail one of these days. It is so perfect that I feel like I don't even have words for it. I love to stand in front of it and look at each little part of it and see how they all come together to form the frame and it is just us.

I know some of you are reading so....thank you!!

Monday Update

2011-12-12T12:34:00.002-06:00

Happy Monday, all. Right now Michael is taking what will hopefully be an extra long nap. The poor boy is just worn out from the weekend and needs to do some catching up. We were busy this weekend. We saw lots of great friends, saw some holiday lights, and even did a little decorating here at our house.

The weather this month has been so wild and crazy. I'm enjoying the mild temperatures and good roads for traveling.

One morning last week the sun was streaming in our window and it was so beautiful. Michael was playing with this little dragonfly plant ornament thing we have and it was kind of like Trace's spirit was with us. I like to think of him as a bird or a butterfly...flying above us and free.

I promised myself I would only talk about good things in this post and so far I am having a hard time thinking of the little good things that have been happening around here although I promise they are happening.

Two months have passed since we lost Trace. I think it is a little hard to believe. Sometimes it seems like the time we had him was like in some sort of dream world and now we are living new lives. I have been having some better days but also some bad days where I cry because my Christmas tree looks so ugly and everything my husband says is the wrong thing (it's not, he's great but I am very emotional).

I've been thinking a lot about little babies lately. Three of our friends have had babies in the last few weeks and I think of them often. Last night we visited a friend with a brand new baby and he was just the sweetest thing. I could have just taken him home with me and kept him forever! ....but please don't worry, I won't really steal your babies or go all "hand that rocks the cradle" on you. It makes me happy to know that even though Trace is gone, there are still sweet little babies being born in the world and life goes on in their new little lives.

And maybe it is Christmas and the coming of the baby Jesus that is making me think so much about new babies. I find myself lingering over the pictures in our Christmas books of the little baby swaddled in the manger and his mother looking at him so lovingly. I feel like that used to be me.

Silent night, holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace

Sleep in heavenly peace, Trace.

Holiday Bokeh Party!

2011-12-08T00:00:00.003-06:00

Hurray for the 2nd annual holiday bokeh party!

I love how these turned out.

I like holiday bokeh. It's magical.

My silly boy.

...and one quick one of the two of us. Happy bokeh-ing! :o)

p.s., here is the link to last year's bokeh post.

iphone photo dump

2011-12-05T14:33:00.002-06:00

I can hardly believe it is December. 5 days already (almost) done. 20 days until Christmas.

....what?

I am not ready. In all aspects...I am not ready. Emotionally, spiritually, physically. I pulled some decorations out of the storage room and looked through them....then left them right by the storage room door. Our tree is still up in the garage rafters. Tonight we have a Christmas concert at church. Am I in the mood to play festive Christmas music? Hardly.

It's hard to pinpoint exactly how I am feeling. Its not that I don't want to celebrate Christmas. Its just that things just don't feel the same and I'm playing by a new set of rules. Having my house all decked out in the holiday spirit just doesn't mean the same thing as it used to mean to me.

Last year at Christmas we were about 20 weeks pregnant with Trace. It felt like we were barely pregnant; we had just started sharing the news about this time in December. I thought that if I could just make it through the first six months of having two small children that I would be okay. That the hard part would over. I thought by Christmas, Michael would be 2 and older and Trace would be sitting up by himself and sleeping well at night.

Well...my visions of two sweet boys in matching pajamas opening presents on Christmas morning remains just that: a vision, a distant memory. And it stinks. It just feels wrong to be celebrating something so big without him. I am struggling with the fine line between grieving his death and being present for the people who are still here on earth with me.

I feel like this journey of our first Christmas in our new life is just beginning so stay tuned. The good news is that all my shopping is done and should start receiving Amazon.com boxes full of gifts on my doorstep any day now.

Have a peaceful week.

Trace's Tree

2011-11-30T14:20:00.004-06:00

He who plants a tree
Plants hope.

--Lucy Larcom

Trace's tree is here!

We picked it out last weekend at our favorite tree farm and our tree guy brought it over the day after Thanksgiving. It is Sienna Glen maple and should look like this in the fall:

The leaves will be an orange red and so far it is the biggest tree in our yard so I think it will be a nice addition to our landscape. I'm happy he was able to bring us a maple tree because they were so beautiful in October when we lost Trace. I mentioned how beautiful they were this year when we were picking it out and our tree guy said it was an exceptional year for maple trees...everything was a perfect combination to make them look so pretty.

We are excited to see it in the spring and hopefully it will be leafed out by Trace's birthday in May. I have lots of plans for more things to plant in the spring as we have many generous gifts to our favorite nursery. I am thinking about doing a rose garden or a butterfly garden but I'm just not sure yet.

Our neighbor was over the day and she said she loved the new tree and was glad we planted it but to also think about doing other things in remembrance of Trace just in case we would ever leave this house. We are planning on living here forever but the Lord knows we can't predict his plan for us so for now I'm thinking of other places where we could possibly plant a tree to remember Trace. Does anyone have any good ideas? I'm thinking our local park we love to visit or maybe one on the public access by our pond. It is so hard to know.

It seems like such a little thing to do but also like a big thing at the same time. It is a another marker in our life, a reminder that Trace was here. I hope we can watch it grow big and strong through the years and changing seasons and think of our little boy.

He who plants a tree
Plants a joy
Plants a comfort that will never cloy;
Every day a fresh reality,
Beautiful and strong.

--Lucy Larcom, "Plant a Tree"

Thanksgiving

2011-11-25T13:52:00.004-06:00

Thanksgiving

For each new morning with its light,
For rest and shelter of the night,
For health and food,
For love and friends,
For everything Thy goodness sends.

--Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

I spent much of Thanksgiving trying to pretend that it wasn't any special day and that I wasn't without my precious baby boy. I thought of him all day and how thankful we are for being blessed with him.

Michael and I did a quick trip to our favorite park in the morning and I spent some time just reflecting and being thankful. Being thankful for the beautiful weather and the sunshine on my face.

Being thankful for my awesome little boy and his joyous spirit.

Being thankful for visions of peace and protective mommy elk.
(she later charged at the fence because we were too close to her sweet baby--yikes!)

....and being thankful for self portraits that graciously auto focus on the rock instead of me. :o)
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We had a great meal at our friend's house to celebrate the holiday. Everything was so awesome and I felt so guilty I didn't cook anything.

Michael was so happy to have a friend just his age to hang with for the afternoon. They were so funny together running around with their toys and pushing their noses up to the tv.

It was a beautiful fall day. 60 degrees and sunny on Thanksgiving? I'll take it.

We are thankful for many things.

I hope your holiday was full of peace of love.

Comparisons

2011-11-22T08:58:00.003-06:00

I was browsing through my photo collection last night and I found some great photos of Michael when he was the same age as Trace. I had done this before and I thought they actually looked pretty similar when they were newborns but as Trace got older, I think he started to look a lot different. Check this out:

Isn't that funny? I like how they are both wearing a little football shirt.

Next, I found this photo of them both blowing raspberries.

I love the chubby baby cheeks!

Finally, a little side by side of the boys at their four month appointment:

It is really funny to me how different they look from each other. I think Trace would have been a really good looking guy, just like his brother. But I think they would have also looked a lot different. It is so sad for me to think about what they would have been like as brothers together and it is just like a big hole in my imagination. I try and imagine Trace being there in different situations and then I have to remind myself that no, he won't be there.

I often think about what it is like in heaven for Trace and I think other people who have lost babies probably can relate. I think about it all the time. Will Trace still be a baby in heaven? Is there a concept of time in heaven? Days and years? It is just so hard for me to come to realization that these are the only photos I will have of Trace...no more. Are there cameras in heaven? Because I will need to do a lot of catching up. :o)

Speaking of heaven, every night before I tuck Michael in we say our prayers. At the end I always say "God Bless baby Trace in heaven". The past few nights after the prayer Michael has said that "Trace is bye bye". It just melts my heart every time and I break down crying. Just hearing Michael say his name makes me so sad. I just want Michael to know that Trace loved him too and he was a part of our family. I'm excited (& sad) to keep sharing Trace's story with Michael as he grows older.

Here's one more of my goofy guy before I get started on my day:

Thanks for sharing a few moments with me! ---Rose

Cyclones' Epic Win!

2011-11-21T08:50:00.003-06:00

On Friday night, Cyclones had the biggest win in school history. We beat the number two ranked Oklahoma State Cowboys.
And it.....was.....AWESOME!!!

(photo source)

Seriously, it was a little unbelievable. I was pretty much in shock the entire game and in disbelief that it was actually happening, waiting for something to go wrong. Some things did go wrong but lots of things went right and we pulled out a victory in double overtime.

(photo source)

(I'm including this photo of the on-side kick because I was in the bathroom and missed it...what!?)

The stadium was wild. After regulation time was over and the score was tied, Jack Trice was so loud! It felt good to feel excited about something. It felt good to have hope...even if it was just the silly hope that your football team wins a big game.

(It also felt good to be the top story on Sports Center!)

Even when the stadium was so loud and rockin', I just so sad inside because I thought how could this be have the same spot where I stood just a few months earlier with my favorite little guy? How could life change that much in one football season? It may be a little weird to get so emotional over a football game but honestly.... it gives me a little hope that good things can still happen in this world. :o)

Our Days

2011-11-17T08:42:00.003-06:00

I thought I would just share some photos from our ordinary days around here. We are up to absolutely nothing exciting but I feel like that is what we need right now.

Eating donuts (do-dos) with grandma early on Saturday morning before the ISU game. A friend dropped off a little meal care package for me with a six pack of Sam Adams beer and three big donuts with Cyclone sprinkles. It was the best!

We've also been watching entirely too much TV and sometimes even taking naps on the couch. I was selected to do the Nielsen ratings this past week and it was embarrassing to record what I actually watch. Essentially all the shows watched in this house are on three different channels: PBS (kids), Bravo, and HBO.

Michael has really been having fun drawing lately and he just looked so cute that I had to get my camera out.

His favorite things to draw are: hockey balls, hockey sticks, dad playing hockey, daddy's boat, suns, and moons. I'm not sure where this whole hockey obsession is coming from, but I'm sure its due to many hours of Scott's grooming. He got Michael this little hockey goal set and Michael loves it. He loves it so much now that any ball is now a hockey ball, and any sport on TV is hockey, and anyone playing hockey is Daddy. Lord, help me. Can I really deal with a lifetime of two sets of smelly hockey gear in my house?? :o)

He loves to draw and talk about what he is drawing and I think it is just so cute. He is getting so smart.

Its hard to find things that Michael likes to eat that are also easy for me to give him (hopefully this is temporary and soon I will unlock some magic healthy recipes and energy to make them) but for now he's really been liking those little drinkable yogurt things. We call it a milkshake and he really goes for it.

He just looks so grown up and handsome to me sometimes. He is getting so smart and starting to put all the pieces in the world around him together. The other day when I was looking at Trace's photo book, Michael ran and got some prints of Trace that were sitting out on the counter because he knew that those pictures of Trace needed to go in the book with the other pictures. He also loves to find pairs of his toys and then show me how he has two of them. "Two trucks, two cows, two boats".

Michael is such a joy to us and we love him so much. Sometimes it is just too hard to think about what could have been with Michael and Trace. I think they would have had lots of fun growing up together.

So that's pretty much what we've been up to here....trying to hang in there and take each day as it comes.

It's here:

2011-11-16T09:03:00.003-06:00

The product of many hours and tears arrived in the mail yesterday:

It was Trace's memory album!

I ordered a 12x12 book from Mixbook.com using a Groupon that I had purchased before we lost Trace. When I bought the Groupon I thought I would use it to make some gifts or something else because I am trying to think of a way to better organize the boys' photos rather than yearly books (more like a scrapbook type book, with full printed photo pages that you can keep adding to or rearrange).

Little did I know at the time that I would be using the credit to make my baby's only album. It is beautiful and I love every photo but it just makes me so sad to think that this is all we got: one stupid photo book instead of a lifetime of memories.

I hate myself for even saying things like that. I know there are so many mommies who never got to see their baby's faces let alone have four months with them. But...it still sucks.

I'm glad I got the photo book done. I love having something tangible that I can hold in my hands, feel with my fingers and carry from room to room. Working on it was a healing experience- just to know that he was here, he was ours and we loved him.

I also bought supplies for a more traditional scrapbook for Trace where I can keep some items that are not photos. It will be nice. I want to get parts of my blog published somewhere but I am having a hard time thinking about how I want to do it. I thought I could print entries from Trace's birth until his death but then I thought....Trace's story is so much more than just the four months he was with us. It started before he was born and I don't think it is over yet. I still have more to tell...he still has more to share with us.

For you created my inmost being;

You knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

Your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you
When I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

Your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
Were written in your book
Before one of them came to be.

- Psalm 139: 13-16

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Thank you all again for all your wonderful comments. You have no idea how much they mean to me. It has been hard for me to reply because it is hard for me to put into words how I'm feeling some days.

Some days have been okay, but I have not been feeling the best this week. I've been trying to get back into some of my former activities but it has been adding stress that just seems to be multiplying to unhealthy levels. It is hard to try and figure out what my new normal is and find the balance between being a hermit locked up in my house and being out and about all the time. Please pray for peace and healing. :o)

with much love...Rose

Trace's name

2011-11-11T08:17:00.003-06:00

We had a hard time thinking of a name for our sweet boy. We didn't actually consider the name Trace as contender until right before he was born. I told Scott that when the baby was born he could just say his name right when they asked us, which is usually right after you deliver. He took my passing comment to heart and as soon as I was wheeled to the recovery room, Scott named our new son. Trace it was, even though there wasn't a lot of discussion about it and I was a little surprised.

"That's really his name?", I thought. I didn't even know anyone named Trace.
Over time it seemed to be a perfect fit for our little boy and I couldn't have imagined a name more perfect.

I wanted to share some meanings of the word trace with you, as our pastor shared with us during Trace's memorial service. These words are a comfort to me...they are so perfect and speak right to my heart.

trace:

A mark, impression, or visible appearance of anything left when the thing itself no longer exists.

A mark left by anything passing; a track; a path; a course; a footprint; a vestige.

To follow by some mark that has been left by a person or thing which has preceded.

( http://www.brainyquote.com/words/tr/trace231441.html#ixzz1dFImcyEO)

Dear sweet Trace,

We are so blessed you have left your mark on our lives and our hearts.
Thank you for leaving a path for us to follow in our lives.
We love you.

Trace

2011-11-09T11:56:00.007-06:00

Where to even start? This is a question I've been asking myself every day for the past month....where to begin? What do I do now? How am I going to get through these moments, through today, through the rest of my life?

So I guess I'll just start somewhere...

We lost Trace on October 10th.

I went to grab him to feed him early in the morning and I knew something was wrong as soon as I opened the door to the room and saw him in his bed.

He was gone. He died in his sleep.

He was four months old.

We miss him so much every day. Things are not the same without him in our lives.

I miss his quick smile, his chubby cheeks, the joy in his heart, and the light in his eyes.

I don't know if this will get any easier but I feel like I needed to say something...just to put my story out there. I used to feel like bad things like this never really happened to people, at least not to people in my world. Now I know.
Now I know what it means to be sad, to be lost. I know that there are guarantees in this life. I am forever changed and my world will never be the same.

But I also know that God is bigger than death and I know Trace is in heaven.
I believe it with all my heart. If there is one thing I know for sure, it is that Trace is safe in God's arms and free from the trials and pain of this world. I feel Trace's spirit and even though my heart hurts I still have a piece of Trace in it.

Instead of having him in my arms, I now carry him in my heart.

----------------------------------------------

Revelation 21:4
He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away."

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Family and friends,

Thank you so much.

I feel like I can not thank you enough. You have blessed me and humbled my heart. I'm not sure how I will ever repay you all but please rest assured if the need ever arises.....I will be on your front step as quick as I can with a lasagna and bottle of wine in hand. :o)

Two!

2011-10-06T09:06:00.003-05:00

Guess who is two today??

That's right- this big guy is! We did a little pre-birthday celebrating yesterday by hitting up our favorite park and basking in the beautiful weather.

It was the perfect fall day. Sunny, warm, a little breeze, and beautiful leaves on the trees.

I kept up the tradition of taking our fall photos as seen last year's post- Michael's first birthday park photos.

In case you are wondering...yes, I do have to bribe my son to take photos with fruit snacks.

We also had fun looking for "balls"- aka the walnuts that fall from the trees.

It hardly seems like a year has past and yet so much has happened since then! I'll be back with the full blown birthday post later this week- have a great day!

Tuesday Updates

2011-10-04T08:58:00.002-05:00

Wow...where did the weekend go? Where did September go?

We broke our cardinal rule this past weekend and took Michael to an ISU tailgate with us. He actually did really well and it was a beautiful day. He loved riding around in this little wagon train that our friend with twins has! We carted them around for a little bit and everyone thought it was the cutest thing. I think the boys' favorite part was hearing the band play- yay!

It is hard to believe that last time we took Michael to a tailgate he was just a little peanut. And now we have a new little peanut in our family....

I paid $20 again to park close to our tailgating spot in a public lot and then I headed home before kickoff to get the boys into bed. It was kind of fun to watch the game at home on TV in a quiet house...shh, don't tell my husband! However, it was a brutal loss to Texas and it makes me so sad for our team. Luckily we still have a lot of season left so hopefully we'll rally and get some more wins under our belt!

Trace had his four month appointment yesterday. I scheduled it a few weeks late so I could get both boys in at the same time which was a marginally good idea, mostly thanks to the fact that Scott could be there with me. Trace is weighing in at 15.8 pounds and is 26 inches long! He is in the 75% for height and 60% for weight, which keeps him right on the same curve he's been on. He is still clocking in smaller than his brother which just amazes me.

It's Tuesday already and I haven't even started laundry...I think it is going to be a busy day! Have a good one!

The boy and his cars

2011-09-30T08:57:00.000-05:00

Boys and cars....need I say any more?

It just makes me giggle anytime I catch him playing so nicely by himself- usually with his cars.

And just so Mr. Big Guy isn't left out- he's usually just chillin':

Jester Park Nature Time

2011-09-29T09:17:00.003-05:00

Yesterday just did not go how I wanted it to go. It was a bad day all around: I lost my voice but went to school to teach lessons which made me feel even more terrible, Trace had a bad day at daycare, and Michael was cranky (3 razor sharp incisors coming in at the same time). So I decided we needed to get out of the house, get some fresh air, forget our troubles....and that's just what we did!

We of course went to our favorite park, Jester Park. I'm sure you are all sick of hearing about it by now but we love it!

Trace-man.

(notice in the following photos that Michael has a little walnut "ball" in his hands- he picked it up and would not let it go the entire time we were there! He kept calling it "his ball" and then he found an acorn he kept calling "his rock". Boys, boys, boys.)

When I was editing and uploading my photos, I looked back at my files and found my photos from the same time last year at Jester Park. Isn't it funny how we thought Michael was so big at the time?

Here is one more last year/this year comparison:

I guess it is nice to know that his interest of getting as soaked as possible hasn't changed!

We had a great time and our moods were much improved. I'm glad Mother Nature had a chance to work her magic on us!

Wrapping up Summer

2011-09-28T08:49:00.001-05:00

Fall is here and you can feel it in the air. I'm having mixed feelings about summer being over- the days seemed to go by slowly but the weeks flew by. We had a great time enjoying our time as a new family of four and of course we logged lots of hours on our back patio.

I'm afraid our days back here are growing fewer and fewer now that the late afternoons are quickly getting darker and cooler.

Watch out Michael, or you might be attacked by my monster sweet potato vine and be lost forever!

As my flowers grew, so did this little guy:

It is amazing what can happen in just one short season!

...and one more photo for you so you don't think our days are all pink flowers and happy babies here!

Fall Fun at the Apple Orchard

2011-09-27T08:22:00.005-05:00

This past Saturday marked our second annual trip to Center Grover Orchard for some fall fun. Visiting the farm was a great excuse to celebrate the change in seasons and everyone enjoyed the beautiful day!

The day started out a little cool (so not too big of a crowd) so we took advantage of the short line at the tractor rides and hopped aboard.

Michael loved the tractor but he threw a tantrum when it stopped and people started getting off so we figured we better get off too! Luckily we had stopped at the corn maze so we gave it a whirl. I think Michael was happy to get out and stretch his little legs. I was also happy that I did not have to a push a stroller around!

Michael loved this little train and I think he rode it about 3 times in a row. He did try to get off of it while it was moving so that was our last time aboard.

Michael's absolutely favorite part of the whole day was....the jumping pillow!!!

He jumped and jumped and jumped and jumped. Loved it!

We also bought a nice lunch from the little feed bunk they had and went home with apples, apple cider, and donuts. Michael was worn out and took a great nap when we got home- I would call the day a success! We can't wait to go back again next year!

Here is the link to our trip from last year, so funny to see how Michael has changed!

Trace: Four Months

2011-09-21T15:35:00.003-05:00

Just now, I was selecting photos for this post and I had a strange deja vu moment where I swore I already did a four month post. Then I forgot what day Trace was actually born on. Then I remembered that I was thinking about his three month post...wasn't it just yesterday I was writing that one?

Gosh, I am losing it. Time is flying. This little guy is growing fast. He desperately wants to be big like his brother so he can play and run and jump!

His eyes are always on Michael, following his every move. Michael and I have this game we like to play which involves running laps around the house and yelling, "Hi Trace!!" at Trace when we pass him. It's great fun (really) and Trace loves it. He yells and giggles right along with us and thinks he is big stuff being part of the action.

Mr. Big Stuff also recently started doing this:

...what!?

I know, right? He is not big enough to be almost sitting up by himself!

He also loves playing with his little toys and has started to reach and grab them. He looks so intently at the little toys with faces- it is really cute to see him hanging out with his pals.

He's getting stronger with his tummy time and is in this position for lots of the day. Sometimes his little legs will even scoot him around like he is trying to squirm away from me. Rolling is not happening very regularly yet- he has gotten stuck a few times in a half roll over position but I'm sure we'll get there in due time.

"Mom, are you kidding me?"

All in all, Trace continues to amaze us every day. He is great sleeper, eater and snuggler. He also recently started riding in the car better, for which our ears and blood pressure thank him.

I am so thankful for both of my beautiful babies to hug and hold. I was working on Michael's 2nd year photo book this week and it just amazed me how I can barely remember what days were like before Trace was here- it seems like another life ago. We are so happy you are part of our family, Trace! We love you!

Weekend Fun

2011-09-19T14:34:00.003-05:00

It is hard to believe today is Monday and the weekend has come and gone. We celebrated another Cyclone victory Friday night during our game-watch party. Enjoying the game from the comforts of home was much appreciated, especially since it was kind of a wet and dreary weekend outside. Saturday morning was spent at home with the boys while Scott worked and later that afternoon we headed up to Ames for a wedding. The ceremony was nice and Scott had fun catching up with some of his fraternity brothers- they even headed over to their old house for a bit. I waited in the car with Trace because man....I just feel so old these days when I am around college kids.

Yesterday was another rainy day so we were stuck inside yet again. Michael had lots of fun racing his cars on his little matchbox track and Trace started to sit up on his own! They are getting entirely too big and it is so sad to me. I snuck out of the house for a bit while they were napping and did a little shopping at a few local consignment shops. I usually go during the week and yesterday they were packed- probably because everyone else was panicking just like me with this cold weather and trying to get their kids' wardrobes in order. I got a ton of adorable things for the boys and most of it was exactly what I was looking for- little fleece pants and jackets for Trace, onesies for Trace, jeans, and sweatshirts for Michael. I even found a pair of super cute converse shoes for Michael that I was just contemplating buying at Target when I saw them last week. We just need some new undershirts and socks for the boys to round out their basics and then I think we will be set. Managing kids' clothing is one of those things I never expected would be so hard as a parent. It is especially time consuming because I have to go back through all of Michael's old clothes that I kept and figure out what will work for Trace and fill in the holes. Lots of Michael's super cute winter sleepers and things just fit Trace perfectly now and I think he is the middle of a growth spurt so I'm not holding out hope they will fit much longer!

Sorry for the novel.... wowzers. Happy Monday!

Boys

2011-09-16T13:05:00.002-05:00

Okay....why is it so difficult to take a photo of my two boys together? It is so stinkin' hard!

My aunt had given me these cute little coordinating outfits and I needed to get a photo of them before Trace outgrew his. I had to bribe Michael with the camera remote to even sit beside his brother; actually sitting still was another story.

Don't be fooled: I'm pretty sure this is not an actual hug, but Michael trying to smash his brother.

This is pretty much the best I got wow, huh? At the least it is a very accurate portrayal of life these days!

Just for the record, Trace's hair is not orange. There was a weird color cast thing going on that I couldn't get rid of with my sub-par photoshop skillz. Also, Michael was the recipient of a new haircut yesterday so no more shaggy hair for him!

Happy Friday, all! :o)

A little light reading...

2011-09-15T08:18:00.003-05:00

"Hmm... so that's not my puppy?"

"This puppy business is getting very interesting..."

"My book is good but I just feel like someone is watching me..."

It's mommy!

...all in a day's hard work for Trace!

We are having a pretty good week especially since it seems to be flying by and it's already Thursday. I have been enjoying the Cyclone win all week and soaking in the feeling that all is right with the world until the two teams meet again. The radio dial has been tuned into sports talk every time I'm in the car so I can listen to all the Hawkeye fans call in and cry about the loss. It's a sickness, really.

Speaking of sickness... I was home from school on Monday feeling severely under the weather. I'm not sure if it was a combination of dehydration from the game on Saturday or lack of sleep or what but it was a big wake up call for us to get Trace out of our room and sleeping through the night. Being up every two hours to nurse and hold a baby through the night has been taking its toll on my physical, mental and emotional health. My back is in knots and it is making everything hurt and the pain killers I was taking were adding tummy troubles on top of everything. We are only on night three and things are already loads better on the Trace sleeping front- now it's just me who needs help sleeping all the way through the night! I'm looking forward to a big improvement soon!

Cyclones win!

2011-09-11T10:23:00.007-05:00

Yesterday was a great day to be a Cyclone. Technically, every day is a great day to be a Cyclone but especially yesterday was because....we beat the Hawkeyes!!!

Woo!!!

(above images from dmregister.com)

It was an awesome game. People are saying it was the best in the series since '02, which is one of my personal highlights of being a Cyclone fan. We won in a triple overtime, but the game was pretty good up to that point. It was nerve wracking but I'm glad we didn't have to go through another heartbreak like we did last year against Nebraska.

Everyone stormed the field after the game. It was awesome!

We got to our tailgating spot at 6 a.m. and watch the sun come up. It was cold and dark for a while, but we quickly warmed up with food and drinks.

Mimosas!

Who invited the Hawk fans? Oh right...we did. :o) Scott's parents came to the game and brought a long some of their friends from their old hometown. It was nice to have a big group to enjoy the morning with.

Denise stopped by with some friends bright and early awesome. I think she had a great time at the game too!

It was such an awesome day spent with friends and it feels like all is right with the world again. :o)

Just so they don't feel left out, here are a few photos of the boys:

I hope your weekend was just as nice and....go cyclones!

Ordinary Days

2011-09-09T07:21:00.003-05:00

Have you been enjoying this great cooler weather? We sure have! Every day we've been going for a walk and exploring new parks in the area. Michael has been having trouble sleeping lately so I'm trying to wear him out!

We've also been reading books. And reading books. And reading books. Michael had a sitter last weekend and when I drove her home she said they read, "like a 100 books!". She was cute.

Michael used to only say, "BooKS!" when he wanted us to read to him. But now he will say, "Mommy read books...in chair". And he'll take his book to the chair and pat it. It is really cute. Every day he surprises me with something he says and the connections he makes.

It's been a busy week around here (why do the shortest weeks always seem the longest?) and next week is even busier. I'm trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel!

Happy Friday!

Two Peas

2011-09-06T07:35:00.002-05:00

I dug out my most favorite outfit for Trace to wear to the game on Saturday and then I found a photo of Michael wearing it! I think Michael is actually a bit older in this photo and Trace is lying down, which is why he looks a little goofy.

I fell in love with this little fleece outfit when I saw it at Target when Michael was first born but I didn't want to purchase it because I thought it was a little pricey. Low and behold, we got it later as a very nice baby gift! I'm so glad I get to bring it out again and hopefully it gets lots of wear and love from Trace too.

Trace's First Cyclone Game!

2011-09-05T10:44:00.003-05:00

On Saturday, the Cyclones pulled out a very close win over UNI during the season opener. Yikes...it was pretty ugly, even though in an after game interview our head coach said, "There's no such thing as an ugly win."

We had a bit of trouble finding a sitter for Michael but we got a number of a really nice girl who lives down the street from us and it worked out really well. I think she had a great time playing with Michael and it was better than trying to bring him along to the game. It was raining and a little chilly and well...it is just too much for him at this age.

Trace, however, had a great time at the game! We even got a really awesome parking spot for having a baby with us (for the low, low price of $20!).

He did really awesome and it was fun to take him to his first Cyclone game! Of course they will be few and far between until he is a bit older, but it was still great.

I had my camera out for a total of about six seconds while I snapped the following photos:

Go cyclones!
I'm already resting up for next week's 5:30 a.m. tailgate against Iowa!

Too cute not to share...

2011-09-02T08:30:00.003-05:00

Michael looked so funny yesterday. This picture just cracks me up!

Does anyone want to guess what he did next?

That's right...jumping, jumping, jumping!

I hate that he has his binky in these photos but we are feeling a bit under the weather here today. I asked him to take it out and then I got this:

goofball.

Can you believe it is really September? Fall is in the air!

Hypnotize

2011-09-01T15:25:00.003-05:00

Doesn't it look like Trace is totally trying to hypnotize someone in this photo? It's like he's saying, "Feed me...change my diaper....swaddle me up real tight and put me in my swing..."
(aka: our day in a nutshell)

We are having a low key day today. I am still getting used to my new schedule at school so it feels weird to me to be home on a Thursday. We went to the library this morning and then to the grocery store, trying to get out before the heat settles in. Michael took a real nap today which has not been the norm lately- usually he's been sleeping for only an hour or so. I was super tired so I just lied down next to him and we both dozed off. It was nice to have some extra time to get things done around the house. I just don't know when else to get housework done- usually I am so beat by the time the day is over and the kids are in bed I just want to veg out and go to bed myself.

Trace is busy as ever and loves to tell me all sorts of things with his ooos and ahhhs. He always has extra to say after a day at daycare- it is good to know that he misses me and wants to fill me in on his day.

In case you are wondering where Michael is....he is a big, goobery mess today and won't give up his binky. I'm thinking either teething or allergies? Hopefully it will be over soon!

An instagram tour through girls weekend

2011-08-29T16:01:00.006-05:00

This past weekend was the 2nd annual Girls Weekend!

We had a great time in Kansas City. It was very relaxing and I had a great time being away from home for a bit. I had to haul some extra stuff along with me so I didn't want to add to the load by bringing my big camera and so we have another post full of my cell photos....sorry. Can you tell this is a reoccurring theme in my life lately?

Lots of fun was had shopping, browsing, and eating. We stayed right by the County Club Plaza and it was nice to be central to our entertainment options. Our hotel was also close to the Westport area where we spent Saturday night eating Thai food and singing at a piano bar. We got all loaded up in the car and got the address into the GPS and then we drove to Westport and realized we were only a few blocks away and could still see our hotel!

I tried to drink a beer at every meal....I am terrible!

My favorite purchase was a pair of sandals from The Walking Store. The sales guy was good and totally sold me on them but now that I've worn them non stop for two days I can attest to their awesomeness!

We did lots of eating and my favorite places were Blanc Burgers + Bottles and The Melting Pot. At the Melting Pot we did a cheese course, salads, and then CHOCOLATE. It was so good I had dreams about it that night- I would definitely recommend it! It was so fun to be out and able to enjoy a meal without kids. I do love them but it was nice to have a break!

Now we are back to it with another week already in full swing. Only a few more days until Cyclone football kicks off!

Friday Dance

2011-08-26T13:04:00.002-05:00

Come on everyone...do the Friday dance!

(bubbles optional)

I am so happy this week is over! It has been a long haul but by golly, we made it. Today, I had a quick morning of helping a friend out with some lessons, a trip to Target (their fall stuff is out and I wanted to buy all of it!!) and then home again for some lunch and naps. Life is good.

I've really missed my little guys this week. Poor Trace just wants to nurse and snuggle all night long- he is probably afraid I am going to keep leaving him.

Next week things should be back to "normal" and we will be testing out our newer routine. Can't wait! Happy Weekend, all!

Playing catch up

2011-08-24T16:22:00.004-05:00

It's official- we are back in the swing of things! School has started and I have the first day under my belt. I think it is going to be a great year but it has made for a busy, busy week (and it's only half over!)

So...I'm catching up today.

We went back to the fair last week to spend some time with my family. The above photo is from our previous visit, but it was too sweet to share! Also...that tractor costs more than our HOUSE.

We got a chance to visit with my grandparents (hi!) and they were doing great. We ate breakfast at the cattlemen's tent and it was nice and quiet. I love being at the fair before all the hustle and bustle of the day gets started.

Michael spent at least an hour (probably more) running and playing in the fountains. We brought his swimsuit and he was just having a blast- yelling and laughing the whole time.

My mom stayed with the boys for two days this week while I was at meetings. Those are long days for everyone and I'm glad she came to help. I think it went well and it paid off because today Trace had an excellent day at daycare!

Our provider said, "Did you say he had trouble taking a bottle?" ...because he took two bottles with no problems for her and then took another one from me when we got home. Yay!! I knew he could do it!

It feels good to be over those hurdles and getting ready for the next. Here's to a smooth rest of the week!

Trace: Three Months

2011-08-19T14:43:00.003-05:00

Trace, you are now three months old! Wow!

You are a busy bee and love playing with your toys. You have just started to be able to grab things and you love to kick your legs. You like to "sing" and "talk" and love to smile when people look at you. You are growing like a weed and I love how chubby you are getting. You love to watch Michael when he is playing and I think you will have a grand time going to daycare starting next week.

You are getting entirely too big, too fast and I wish you'd stay little!

We love you very much!

Guess what's blooming?

2011-08-17T08:21:00.002-05:00

Without a doubt, these are my favorite. After seeing the state fair garden yesterday, I am planting way more zinnias next year. I even spent a few minutes online last night researching new varieties I can order in the spring. Could you imagine a whole garden filled with them? So lovely.

I have lots of patches of zinnias that grew from where I just threw a handful of seeds on the ground. I wasn't sure if they were going to grow from the seeds I saved from last year so I was pretty careless about it- I will have to be more mindful next year. Also, it appears I only saved pink, yellow and orange seeds! Also popped up in this area was one rogue petunia- do you spot it?

Happy hearts.

Iowa State Fair

2011-08-16T18:06:00.003-05:00

Wowzers...we are back home from a long day at the state fair and let me tell you- my dogs are barking! When did I become such an old lady that my feet hurt whenever I spend a day on them?

It was raining this morning when we headed out so I left my real camera at home. So here is the end result- a day full of instagram photos! I think they are fun and something a little different. We had a great time and I'm glad Michael could enjoy the fair more now that he is a little older.

We did the "Little Hands on the Farm" early this morning after the rain stopped and we had the place to ourselves. Michael had a blast and everything was so cute.

My favorite part was the Bauder's peppermint bar followed by a stroll through the garden. They had so many varieties of zinnias and coleus that I hadn't seen before. I think I might have to do some ordering from a catalog or something next spring because I am in love!

Trace did really well and spent about half the time in the stroller and half the time in the carrier. I only fed him once at the fair in the super sweet baby nursing room and then in the car before and after. He was a good baby and got lots of compliments from people!

We'll be back later in the week so look for more updates... I'm now tucking myself in for a nice long evening of resting and putting my poor feet up!

Friday!

2011-08-12T07:22:00.004-05:00

Can you believe this little guy is going to be three months old soon? In just 5 days? Wow.

I feel like it took us so long to get to a point with Michael where things actually got easier and here were are again at that stage with Trace. Things are getting easier: he is getting on a better schedule and sleeping better at night. We are still working on the bottle and I am confident he will get it.

Have you ever tried to get a breastfed baby to take a bottle? It is so hard. I'm sure I can't be the only one who has experienced this. We usually try with it for about 15 minutes each feeding session, which adds up to lots of screaming throughout the day. It's hard, and I know it's wearing on Michael too. This week we were in the middle of trying to feed Trace with the bottle and he was screaming and Michael was screaming and then Michael just sunk his sharp teeth into Trace's fat, chubby little leg and wow...the poor wails from little Trace were heartbreaking. It was tears all around- Michael for going straight to time out and me for torturing my poor little baby.

It was not a good morning.

But we're working on it, and there are lots of good moments in there along with the frustrating.

The good....the weather here has been amazing this week. Nice and cool and just perfect. We went to the zoo for a little bit this week and the animals were all up and about. Some animals that I have never seen move like the gibbons were all up and swinging about. It was awesome.

The bad...my least favorite part of the day are the hours between naptime and bedtime. It is hard waiting for Scott to get home, get dinner on the table, and get kids into bed. I've been trying to be a little bit proactive about this and trying to find some activities to do during this time. It seems to be helping. I usually try not to be out and about after 4 because of traffic but sometimes an outing really helps with things, even if it is just to the small grocery store down the road (which actually doesn't get busy with the after work crowd until 5).

Good...I've been trying to take pictures in manual mode on my camera. It is a fun challenge even though I really have no idea what I'm doing.

Good...Michael loves my flowers. Bad....Michael likes my flowers.

In other randomness, I switched out the upstairs toys this week to give Michael a fresh basket of play things and that has turned out to be a good decision. Our toys keep migrating upstairs to our already overflowing toy basket, so I finally took them back downstairs and sorted, put away, and pulled out fresh ones. I even started a little basket of toys for Trace since he likes looking at them these days!

...and there's my little chunky monkey now! Happy Friday!

Family Weekend

2011-08-10T07:34:00.003-05:00

We hosted Scott's sister and her family last weekend. They were here to meet Trace and of course Ellie and Michael had lots of fun playing together.

Our first stop on Saturday was to the zoo. My little groupon deal I bought this spring has paid for itself probably 10 times over. It is so nice to have a membership you can bring guests on; everyone got in for free! We did a lap around the zoo and stayed for about 90 minutes before the humidity got to the best of us.

This picture makes Michael look so big! This was our first trip to the zoo where Michael walked the whole time, thanks in part to Scott who could hold his hand while I wore Trace. It was busy and I'm glad we didn't have a stroller!

We got to feed this guy- another first for me. He is so beautiful up close!

The big male lion was out snoozing on the big rock right in front of the window. So great!

We also had plenty of time just chilling at home and Jen made us some of her blackberry margaritas. She needed some taste testers for a new recipe and we were definitely willing guinea pigs!

Saturday night we headed to Big Creek state park for a picnic but it was way too hot and plus there were a ton of people around. It was kind of a bust- I should have stuck to my familiar Jester Park! Live and learn, I guess. It was Michael's first time at this little beach and he was pretty excited about it.

All in all, it was a great weekend with family. I am living up my final days before school starts in just a few weeks!

Fair and Family

2011-08-08T08:42:00.003-05:00

I bravely made the trek back to my hometown this past week for a quick visit. I was pretty proud of myself for making the 3 hour drive with two small kids all by myself! We had very good car rides both on the way there and back...no crying and just one stop. And yes, you can call me supermom if you want.

We stopped by the nursing home to see my grandma and we drew quite a crowd. Michael was being grumpy so one of the ladies at the home gave him a little dish of ice cream and then he was a wild man. We met grandma in the dining room so at least Michael had lots of room to run.

I was happy grandma got to meet Trace. He was such a good baby for her.

Michael had such a good time on the farm, especially with his uncle "Sim" (Sam). Michael looks a lot like Sam when he was a kid; I think it is that blonde, blonde hair!

Hannah, the newest addition to the family. She's a Saint Bernard, can you believe it?

On Thursday we got up early to watch the hog show at the county fair. It was exciting! Denise got two purple ribbons for best in her class and it was pretty entertaining to watch her show her pigs.

The boys both had a nice time at the fair, and we ran into lots of old friends. I'm sure the county fair will become a fast tradition with my boys just like it was for me!

We had a great time and can't wait until next year!

Phone Friday

2011-08-05T17:42:00.000-05:00

Weekend

2011-08-02T08:01:00.002-05:00

We were at Scott's parents' house this weekend for a little visit so they could see the boys. Scott actually rode another day of RAGBRAI with his brother and his kids but we didn't go visit so I don't have any photos to share. Margie and I hung out with the boys and went downtown for their little town festival and actually got there just in time for a little parade! I think Michael has seen about 3 parades this summer and has loved all of them. We did a little shopping and Margie had fun showing off her newest grandchildren. It is so funny to be back in the town where my husband spent the early years of his childhood.

The rest of the weekend was just spent relaxing and playing with cousins. It is so fun to see Michael with his older cousins. I'm glad we get to see them fairly often especially since our extended family is pretty small.

Scott's parents just finished their new addition but it is not quite furnished yet which made a great area for the kids to play and to run!

Michael was so worn out from all the commotion he slept every time we were in the car and even slept in one morning when we got home!

I love the vintage Fisher-Price sets....I think they are always so fun. My grandma had one when I was little, too!

And as usual, Trace spent alot of time snoozing and snuggling!

Monday

2011-08-01T11:54:00.003-05:00

Our heat wave is back again this week. We thought we'd beat the heat this morning and head out to the park to jog and play but when we got home we realized it was already a 100 degree heat index. The sun was brutal.

Scott did a day of RAGBRAI this past week and it was weird not having him do the whole week. Hopefully he'll be able to get back into it next summer and ride the whole time. I met up with him and his friend Adam in one of the small towns to say hi. Michael loved seeing the bikes and waving bye to all the riders.

The elementary school brought our their tables for the riders to use. It is just the right size for Michael and makes Scott look like a giant!

I realize I always post these photos and it looks so funny because Trace isn't in them even though he is there with us. He is usually riding happily in my ergo carrier and looks something like this:

Happy Monday!

5 Years!

2011-07-29T08:46:00.002-05:00

It's my husband's and I's anniversary today! 5 years...sounds kind of crazy, doesn't it? In a lot of ways things have stayed the same- same house (which we are still trying to finish, just 5 short years after we started) and same jobs. But now our family is much larger and much louder and it fills our beautiful home with so much fun and love. I can hardly even believe that it used to just be Scott and I. What was that like?

And I guess we are still driving the same cars. Are we boring or what?

We went out to a nice dinner without kids last night, thanks to Scott's boss's family who took them for the night. I think all the kids had a blast! We had a great time out in our old neighborhood where we lived when we were first married-we ate at Mojo's and got ice cream at Van Dees. At dinner we said we should have written down where we thought we'd be in 5 years and see if it matched up. You know, like you do when you are a senior in high school?

We talked about where we wanted to be in another 5 years, but it is hard to imagine life that far in the future. In 5 years, Michael will almost be 6 and Trace will be 4. Crazy. In 5 years we will hopefully be thinking about baby #3, will definitely have the house finished finished, and will enjoy having children that are out of diapers (hopefully-ha). We also think it would be a great time for our big family trip to DisneyWorld...we better start saving now!

It's been real fun, honey. I love you!

Here's a link to last year's post!, and here is a link to our 3 years post!

We're lovin' it

2011-07-26T12:29:00.003-05:00

I finally visited the High Trestle Trail this weekend! It is just a few miles north of our house and it is beautiful. We went on Sunday and the weather was nice and it was so fun to see lots of people out enjoying the morning also. Everyone would say hello or good morning as they passed and eventually Michael caught on and would say hi to people as well.

Scott rode his bike and I walked from the trail head in Madrid. I didn't realize how far it was to the bridge, but it's like 3 miles! The bridge itself is 1/2 a mile long and then when you add in the distance back (luckily Scott met me on a gravel road and picked us up), it was like 5 miles of walking. I was tired!

Michael surprises me every day with the new things that he says. We were out in the yard and I was doing some weeding and he was beside me playing. He saw what I was doing and he goes "I help...weeds". It was so cute. I've been trying to get him to ask for help when he needs it because like all men, he already has a problem with that one. :o) It is so cute to hear him put a few words together to make little sentences.

Dad and Denise were here for an overnight and Michael had so much fun. Michael held Denise's hand and walked around the house and kept saying, "Bye, mom!" to me....I think he really wanted to go home with them.

They were playing ring around the rosie and then Michael started playing it with just his bear except the only word he would say was "down!".

Nutella on a graham cracker is so delicious. I made Michael some nutella pancakes and now thankfully all of it is gone- that stuff is too good.

Have you been enjoying the fresh fruit this summer? I am so happy that the prices are reasonable that we have been gobbling it up. Michael loves his berries!

DIY Shelf

2011-07-25T13:27:00.004-05:00

For those of you who have known me before I had kids-I used to have lots more time to dedicate to DIY and home decor. These days, most of my time is spent just trying to rein in my little toddler tornado from too much destruction.

However, I did get the spark to whip up a cool ledge shelf that I kept seeing numerous times on pinterest.

Specifically, it was this image caught my attention:

I have a ton of beautiful prints in nice frames that I wanted to showcase somehow in our dining room. I didn't want to put a lot of holes in the walls because those of you who have been in my dining room know there are already lots of holes in the walls from failed previous attempts to hang something. I also wanted something that would be a more flexible gallery than just frames on a wall.

So I headed over to anawhite.com and checked out the plan. It seemed easy enough, and plus we have loads of extra wood in our basement. I initially started the project with some leftover maple trim that we had leftover and was already stained. The only problem was that maple is hard to work with and we broke several screws trying to get the pieces together! So we scrapped my free version of the project and headed to Menards where we bought some really nice pine boards to use. These shelves are called "$10 Ledges" because that is how much one 8 foot long shelf is supposed to cost BUT we spent about $10 on each board so our shelf was much more. The reason why our boards cost more is because they were already sanded and were just a lot better looking than the $3 boards so we just went with it. Anyway, working with the pine was much easier and long story short, here is the finished product:

I really love how it turned out and the way it showcases our large prints. The only problem is what do we do when we have another photo session and more prints to hang? Scott and I already brainstorming where we can install more shelves in our house because after it was all said and done, it wasn't too bad of a project to tackle.

Trace's Two Month Stats

2011-07-24T18:12:00.004-05:00

Before I forget (which seems to be the norm around here lately), I will update you with Trace's 2 month appointment height and weight. And the drum roll please...

Weight: 12 lb, 12 oz
Height: 23 1/2 inches
Head: 15 1/2 inches

He is really growing and getting very chubby! However, he is still the little brother weighing in less than his big brother who was 14 lbs, 4 oz at two months. Trace is just 1/4 inch behind Michael on height and head though so hopefully he will be just as tall and just as smart. :o)

(here is the link to Michael's two month post if you are interested!)

Trace took his shots like a champ and slept away the rest of the day and night. Michael was a good helper in the office and we all survived the outing for the day.

In other Trace news...we are trying to start him on bottles to help with the transition to daycare in a few short weeks (eek!). So far it's not going well, but I'm sure it will improve! After Scott tried to give him a little bottle today it took me about 30 minutes to try and calm him down. :o( Poor guy!

Hot Fun in the Summertime

2011-07-20T20:09:00.006-05:00

It's hot outside!

Every day, the sun is so hot...there's not even clouds in the sky to help to block it. Ugh. We have major cabin fever here. We've still been getting outside a little bit but it is pretty miserable.

Michael and his bananas. He loves them! For a while he was calling pictures of monkeys "nanas" because I would always say, "there's a monkey, he likes to eat bananas." Or in some books, the monkey is actually holding a banana so we have to point that out too. I can see how the kid gets confused.

We are also having major summer hair issues. Both of us. Hopefully one of ours will be resolved before school begins.

My poor baby chipped his front tooth at daycare. We took him to the dentist to have it looked at and that was an equally upsetting experience....I think we will be exploring the world of pediatric dentistry from now on. Our dentist thinks it will be fine, we just have to watch it and make sure it doesn't get infected or do anything weird. Until then, he'll have hockey teeth until whenever it falls out.

In other happenings...

Yay for friends! (Hi, Kelly!)

Yay for rainbow fruit (and for pinterest for making my previous fruit arranging skills feel inadequate).

And yay for sleeping babies (even though I think he is trying to sneak a peek out of one eye).

Pretty Pots

2011-07-19T09:24:00.003-05:00

My two front step pots have been looking just gorgeous lately, so I thought I would share them with you!

I am so afraid they are going to die in this insane heat- it's been 110+ degree heat indexes for a few days and I've been watering all my pots two times a day in hopes of keeping them alive and well. My other plants around the yard are loving the warm, humid weather and are growing like weeds. Unfortunately my weeds are also loving it and are growing well, like weeds.

I love the coleus and it might be a regular around here in future summers. My trailing plants have also covered up my ugly pots...yay!

And because I am lazy- I'm going to make you do the clicking work if you want to see more:

Here is what they looked like in May.
Here, here and here are some of my pots in years past.

Trace is two months old!

2011-07-15T08:38:00.004-05:00

Trace is two months old! Wow...how time flies. It's crazy, really. Day by day, Trace just seems to becoming more of a normal member of our family and things seem to be getting easier. He really is a good baby and I think he is going to have lots of fun with his big brother growing up. My brother and I are close in age also and all my memories from growing up are of me and him...we sure got into a lot of trouble. He was always the mastermind and I was his minion. Hopefully that won't be the case with Trace and Michael, but I'm sure they will get into lots of trouble also!

Anyway, Trace is growing and growing. He is a great eater and his sleeping is really improving. Lately he's been doing lots of 4-5 hour stretches and I really enjoy it! I feel like if I can just get a big chunk of sleep in at the beginning of the night then it's not so bad. He is also getting very strong and can keep his head steady, prop himself up during tummy time, and can bear weight on his legs when being held.

Trace has started smiling at us and he likes to talk with little coos and noises. It is so, so sweet. He likes to look at his toys and really likes to watch his big brother.

He is wearing mostly 0-3 month clothing and wears size 1 diapers. His two month well baby check is on Friday so we'll have the official height and weight stats then.

(and just because I love this photo so much, here it is again in black and white. I think he looks like a little baby doll. Also new discovery: our house has excellent natural light at 6 a.m....oy!)

Comparisons

2011-07-15T08:30:00.003-05:00

Michael and Trace: some days I think they look like twins and other days I think they look totally different...but you can definitely see similarities!

Trace has a different smile for sure; Michael has always had a goofy little smile! They both have beautiful blue eyes and a cute little mouth. Trace's ears stick out a little bit but I think Michael's are bigger.

I am so excited to watch both of my boys change and grow through the years. There is no doubt that they are brothers!

Trace's Newborn Portraits

2011-07-15T07:52:00.000-05:00

Trace got his newborn portraits done right away, when he was just 5 days old. We were on the fence about getting them done but now that we've gotten the portraits back, I am SO glad we did them. They are beautiful and I'm so excited to share them with you!

We bought a large print of the first image and it is beautiful. I have a special project I am working on that hopefully I can share with you soon to showcase my portraits - but like all DIY projects I attempt, it is taking about 20 times as long as it should. We also have a smaller portrait of the second image, to match a similar one we have when Michael was a newborn.

And to give credit where it is very deservedly due...check out His & Hers photography for more beautiful portraits!

A New Normal

2011-07-13T10:41:00.003-05:00

I keep thinking to myself that one of these days things are going to click and I'm not going to be so tired and I won't feel like I'm just trying to do just enough to scrape by every day. I keep thinking I will get everything all scheduled out and we'll all be happy, organized, and healthy. That the house could be clean, I would be all caught up on laundry, the kids entertained, and maybe even get some exercise in. For things to just get back to normal...

But what is normal, anyway?

Of course I expected life to change after having a baby, but it is still hard. I think having a little baby is hard no matter what, let alone trying to tackle life on top of it. I keep reminding myself that things do get easier....but sometimes it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when even getting to the grocery store seems like a big feat.

But really...could normal be better than these two little guys?

I'm sure we will get back into the swing of things sometime but for now we are just taking it day by day. We have some awesome days and some days that are a challenge, but we are still trying to make each one count.

Here's to our new normal!

Friends Weekend Wrap Up

2011-07-11T13:25:00.005-05:00

Warning...photo heavy post ahead! I briefly considered breaking it up into several posts but then I realized that would also be more work and heck, these days I am all about taking the path of least resistance. So here you go!

We had a fun filled weekend hanging with friends from out of town and few from in town. It is so funny how most of us have kids now. Where has time gone? Life has such a crazy way of changing on us.

Group photo...should be a requirement for any friend gathering!

Trace cheesin' for the camera.

Saturday morning the women folk and babies spent a few hours at the zoo while the boys went golfing. It was HOT and busy but we had a good time. I love how you can take a loop around the zoo and see pretty much everything in just a few hours. But even saying that, this time I saw new things even though I've been there a lot so I guess you never know.

Baby friends! So many strollers at the zoo on a Saturday...it was like a little stroller parade.

Trace was such a good baby the whole morning and slept the whole time in the stroller. This is a first- usually I can only get about 30 minutes out of him before I have to carry him in a wrap. It was a good day to not have to carry him because I was sweaty enough the way it was.

Doesn't Michael's little hat make him look like he's on safari?

Three hot and tired kiddos!

Such a sweetie! I love his chubby little ravioli hands.

Saturday night we hung out around the house playing bags and BBQ-ing. We had some awesome mojitos and sangria and it was really fun- low key and laid back, just the way I like it.

Guess who forgot to wear sunscreen on the golf course? Love you, honey!

Attempt #1 at a group photo. We probably could have stood closer to the camera! :o)

Ping-ponging. These guys got skills!

Sunday morning the guys and I got up early and headed out to the lake. It looked like a storm was going to hit but it luckily it just missed us. It made for some cool photos- I love the gray.

Fun fact: this was the first time I've ever seen my husband waterski (usually he wakeboards). So funny!

After skiing, we headed home for a big breakfast/brunch and hung out for a bit before people headed out. The weekend seemed to go way too fast!

It was a great weekend and I'm glad everyone put up with the chaos that occurs in our house with a toddler and a newborn.

Hopefully we can do it again sometime soon!

Mish Mash Photos

2011-07-09T08:42:00.000-05:00

Trace and grandpa.

Swimming at our favorite spot. I wish I had that little arrow in real life to help me keep track of Michael because it is hard! Once at the library I told a little blonde haired boy that it was time for storytime. I couldn't figure out why he wasn't responding. Well...it wasn't my son! They all look alike!

Trace, in a rare moment of contentment.

Sun flare!

These are my only two coneflower blooms. The rest are all diseased. It is a real disaster and I almost cried when I realized it. I cut all my coneflowers way back to see if they will grow out of it but if they don't, I'm in for a big treat next spring after I pull out all the diseased plants.

Michael, in a rare moment of contentment. Pondering the meaning of life, perhaps?

That's all I got for today! Have a good one!

4th of July Weekend: Fireworks and Parade

2011-07-07T09:17:00.001-05:00

We rounded out our holiday weekend with fireworks, a BBQ and a parade. It was nice to keep it low key and close to home!

We went to the parade after eating a little dinner at my aunt and uncle's house. They live just a few blocks from the start of the parade so it worked out well. It wasn't even too hot or humid!

However, we weren't prepared for the massive crowds of candy-hungry children that awaited us!

I'm not going to lie, Michael was pretty jazzed about the candy.

He even found this awesome candy receptacle for all his loot:

We also had a BBQ and bonfire at our house. It was a beautiful night and we had lots of fun.

We also celebrated my brother's 30th birthday. Yeah, I know. It means I'm getting older too!

Michael was not a fan of the fireworks and was screaming his head off. The poor guy, I felt so bad for him. When do kids start to like fireworks?

Happy Fourth of July! Here's to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness!

4th of July Weekend: Farmer's Market

2011-07-06T08:40:00.004-05:00

My parents were here to spend the holiday weekend with us so we decided to head out to the big downtown farmer's market on Saturday morning. Scott and I wanted to take the boat out but all the ramps were either flooded or closed. We were disappointed, but with the extra adults it was good to get out for a bit!

The market was busy but I'm glad we went. I don't think we'll probably make it back anytime this summer. We went stroller-less and I think Michael was happy- there is just too much going on to try and push a huge stroller through.

I saw so many beautiful things for sale...I wish I would have taken more photos!

We got pretty tired and hot by 11 so we got some lunch downtown. It was not busy at all in the restaurant and I think we all enjoyed the rest!

Dad ordered us a sampler rack (it was a brewery) and it was the perfect end to a morning!

Strawberry Picking

2011-06-29T12:51:00.005-05:00

Yay! We had so much fun this morning picking strawberries. We picked up some at a local farm stand a few weeks ago and they were SO GOOD. I've been dreaming about them ever since. It has been a little hit or miss here with the weather and the stawberry season is drawing to a close so this morning we decided to seize the day and head on out to the berry farm.

(strawberries I've been dreaming about)

As you will see from the following photos, Michael clearly enjoyed himself. I think he was happy to actually get to touch the plants since we have a strict rule about that at home.

He ate so many strawberries!

Arn't Osh Gosh overalls are the cutest? The lady at the stand said she always used to dress her son in them too.

Man, those long, skinny, toddler legs get me every time. They are such a reminder that he is a big boy now!

Believe it or not, Trace (sleeping in the wrap) and I were able to pick more strawberries than Michael could eat so we'll be enjoying them after dinner tonight. I can't wait!

2011-06-27T14:25:00.003-05:00

Can you believe that June is almost over? Wow, wow, wow.

It is so hard for us to get out of the house and do things these days so we've just been trying to enjoy the lazy afternoons outside. I feel like this is such a blessing to just be able to slow down and enjoy things a little bit instead of always being on the go. To stop and smell the roses if you will...ha, ha.

I've really been enjoying my garden and I was taking some photos thinking, "Wow- this is so great!" when all of a sudden I saw it:

Do you see it? Yes, it's a snake! Right in my garden. We saw it many more times that day so I guess it officially lives there. Gross, ew, yuck. I couldn't even talk Scampy into coming outside and giving it a run for its money. Lazy cat.

Michael is a card carrying member of the pants-optional club this summer. All clothing optional, apparently. Sometimes it's just easier to go without!

Just for fun, here is Michael last summer:

Wow, huh? Time flies. I can't believe I used to actually be able to get him to look at the camera.

I hope you all are enjoying the rest of June...it will be the 4th of July before we know it!

$5 Fun

2011-06-22T10:27:00.000-05:00

How could anything be more fun than a $5 blow up pool from Menards?

I think we got our money's worth out of this purchase, for sure!

Trace: One Month

2011-06-21T10:13:00.004-05:00

Trace: you are one month old! When your big brother was one month old, I felt like we had really accomplished something. A whole month of surviving! It was getting easier! This time around....I feel like we are just getting started on this crazy journey called life.

It hardly feels like it's been a month since we got up at the crack of dawn and headed to the hospital to meet you. It feels like one quick little blink. It scares me because I wonder if this how fast the rest of life is going to be, too?

Trace, you are really starting to get the hang of things around here. You are a good little tag a long for your brother as he plays and usually you do so without a peep. Unfortunately, you have started nightly fuss-fests which I could really do without but if they wear you out enough to sleep better, I am all for it.

You usually take some nice naps during the day and you like to be outside in the warm, humid weather. You still like to be swaddled tight and snuggled up in the Moby wrap.

We love you very much, Trace!

Hello there

2011-06-20T08:19:00.000-05:00

Why, hello there.

This is hard work, isn't it?

You need to concentrate...

There, you're doing it!

Now let big brother show you something.

Wow! That's wild!

Bye, now!

A Record of Rose

February!

Instagram friday

Picnik

Things that are making me happy today

Survival mode...it's finally Friday!

Missing my baby today

Playtime is serious business

Friday

Ordinary Days and Working Again

A little sunshine

Friday phone dump (vacation edition)

Florida

A late Christmas update

Back to Reality

Merry Christmas!

2011- Trace's Year

Someone's missing...

A little Christmas Color

A week with Aunt Denise

Cantata Weekend

A really wimpy holiday decorating post...

This Boy

iphone photo dump

So Thankful

Monday Update

Silent night, holy night All is calm, all is bright Round yon Virgin Mother and Child Holy Infant so tender and mild Sleep in heavenly peace

Holiday Bokeh Party!

iphone photo dump

Trace's Tree

Thanksgiving

Comparisons

Cyclones' Epic Win!

Our Days

It's here:

Trace's name

Trace

Two!

Tuesday Updates

The boy and his cars

Jester Park Nature Time

Wrapping up Summer

Fall Fun at the Apple Orchard

Trace: Four Months

Weekend Fun

Boys

A little light reading...

Cyclones win!

Ordinary Days

Two Peas

Trace's First Cyclone Game!

Too cute not to share...

Hypnotize

An instagram tour through girls weekend

Friday Dance

Playing catch up

Trace: Three Months

Guess what's blooming?

Iowa State Fair

Friday!

Family Weekend

Fair and Family

Phone Friday

Weekend

Monday

5 Years!

We're lovin' it

DIY Shelf

Trace's Two Month Stats

Hot Fun in the Summertime

Pretty Pots

Trace is two months old!

Comparisons

Trace's Newborn Portraits

A New Normal

Friends Weekend Wrap Up

Mish Mash Photos

4th of July Weekend: Fireworks and Parade

4th of July Weekend: Farmer's Market

Strawberry Picking

Silent night, holy night
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon Virgin Mother and Child
Holy Infant so tender and mild
Sleep in heavenly peace